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Wedding Sermon Ephesians 5:21-33 (Genesis 2:18-24; Ephesians 5:2a, 21-33; John 17:20-26)

Scripture-Specific Wedding Homilies
First Reading
Genesis 2:18-24
Second Reading
Ephesians 5:2a, 21-33
Gospel
John 17:20-26

Homily

Dear friends, what a joy it is to gather here today in the presence of God to witness this beautiful moment in the lives of [Name] and [Name]. On this sacred day, we celebrate not just the union of two people, but the beginning of a covenant relationship that reflects God's own faithful love. Let us pray briefly: Heavenly Father, bless this couple as they begin their journey together, and help us all to understand more deeply the mystery of your love revealed in the sacrament of marriage. Amen.

Today, I want to focus on a powerful truth that emerges from our Scripture readings: "Submitting to One Another in Christ." This mutual submission, this reciprocal self-giving, stands at the heart of Christian marriage and offers [Name] and [Name] a profound vision for their life together.

Our first reading from Genesis reveals God's original design for marriage. "It is not good for the man to be alone," God declares, and creates a suitable partner for Adam. When Adam beholds Eve, he exclaims, "This one, at last, is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh." Here we see the foundation of marriage—two becoming one flesh in a union of equals, each made in God's image, each essential to the other's flourishing. This oneness isn't about losing individuality but about creating something new and beautiful through mutual self-gift.

In our Gospel reading from John 17, Jesus prays for his disciples, asking "that they may all be one, as you, Father, are in me and I in you, that they also may be in us." This profound unity that Jesus desires mirrors the communion of the Trinity itself—distinct persons united in perfect love. [Name] and [Name], your marriage is called to reflect this divine unity, where your distinct personalities and gifts don't compete but complement one another in love.

But it is in our second reading from Ephesians that we find our theme most clearly articulated. St. Paul begins with this remarkable instruction: "Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ." Before he speaks about specific roles, Paul establishes the fundamental principle of Christian relationships: mutual submission. This mutual submission flows from our reverence for Christ and our desire to imitate his self-giving love.

Paul then uses the relationship between Christ and the Church to illuminate the mystery of marriage. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." Christ's love wasn't about domination but about sacrifice—giving himself completely for the good of his beloved. This is the model for all Christians, but especially for spouses. Each partner is called to put the other's needs before their own, to seek the other's good, to serve rather than be served.

[Name] and [Name], this mutual submission doesn't mean erasing your unique identities or silencing your voices. Rather, it means bringing your full selves—your gifts, dreams, and perspectives—and placing them at the service of your shared life. It means listening deeply to one another, honoring each other's dignity, and supporting each other's growth in holiness.

The beauty of this mutual submission is that it creates a space where both spouses can flourish. When both husband and wife strive to outdo one another in showing honor, as St. Paul encourages in Romans 12:10, their marriage becomes not a power struggle but a dance of love. When both seek to wash the other's feet, as Jesus did for his disciples, their home becomes not a battlefield but a sanctuary of grace.

This mutual submission in Christ transforms marriage from a mere human arrangement into a sacrament—a visible sign of God's invisible grace. When you submit to one another in love, you make Christ's sacrificial love present in our world. Your daily acts of service, forgiveness, and tenderness become living witnesses to the Gospel.

How might you live out this mutual submission in your daily life together? Let me offer three practical suggestions:

First, practice attentive listening. In our busy world, truly hearing one another is a profound act of love. Set aside time each day to share your thoughts, feelings, and experiences without distractions. Listen not just to respond, but to understand. When conflicts arise, as they inevitably will, seek first to understand before being understood.

Second, honor each other's gifts. God has blessed each of you with unique talents, perspectives, and strengths. Recognize these gifts in one another, create space for them to flourish, and celebrate how they enrich your shared life. Remember that your differences aren't obstacles to overcome but gifts to embrace.

Third, pray together daily. In prayer, you both submit yourselves to God and receive the grace to submit to one another. Make time for shared prayer, Scripture reading, and worship. These spiritual practices will anchor your marriage in Christ and remind you that your love is part of something greater than yourselves.

[Name] and [Name], as you begin this sacred journey together, remember that the path of mutual submission isn't always easy. There will be days when selfishness seems easier than sacrifice, when pride feels more natural than humility. But the beauty of Christian marriage is that you don't walk this path alone. Christ walks with you, offering his grace, strength, and example.

In the moments when submission feels difficult, remember Christ who "emptied himself, taking the form of a servant" (Philippians 2:7). Remember that in God's upside-down kingdom, the way up is down, the path to greatness is service, and the secret to finding your life is giving it away.

As you submit to one another in Christ, may your marriage become a living icon of God's faithful love. May your home be a place where grace abounds, where forgiveness flows freely, and where Christ's presence is palpable. And may all who encounter your love be drawn closer to the God who is love itself.

May God, who has called you to this sacred vocation, strengthen you daily to live it with joy, courage, and fidelity. Amen.

Sources Consulted

  • Pope John Paul II, "Familiaris Consortio" (On the Role of the Christian Family in the Modern World)
  • Pope Francis, "Amoris Laetitia" (The Joy of Love)
  • Catechism of the Catholic Church, §§1601-1666 on The Sacrament of Matrimony
  • St. John Chrysostom, "Homilies on Ephesians"
  • St. Augustine, "The Good of Marriage"
  • Scott Hahn, "First Comes Love: Finding Your Family in the Church and the Trinity"
  • Edward Sri, "Men, Women and the Mystery of Love: Practical Insights from John Paul II's Love and Responsibility"
  • Christopher West, "Theology of the Body for Beginners"
Published on: June 14, 2025
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